They Call Me Junebug

Stop and order the roses, it's good for you!

Sometimes, marriage is hard. Sometimes, marriage is really hard. And sometimes, it’s not really anybody’s fault. But most of the time, both spouses are responsible for the difficult times.

I know when my husband makes life hard or sad or difficult for me, I always return the favor. I’m not proud of it, but it’s true. He disappoints me or ignores me or just plain pisses me off, and I make my displeasure known, and not always in the healthy, communicative way they espouse on Dr. Phil

I like to stew about it. Ruminate what could have possibly made my husband act this way. I like to ignore him, tune him out, give him the cold shoulder, anything that will send a clear “I don’t like you right now” vibe his way. Eating dinner in the bedroom, getting in bed at 8:30 to watch TV, these are ways I express my displeasure or hurt feelings.

To both of our chagrins, he does not respond well to these tactics. This of course does nothing to lighten the mood of our household.

All of this to say, flowers from the grocery store do not an apology make.

Nothing screams “I’m sorry” like flowers sent to the office, the most “public” admission a woman could require of a man. Flowers to the office let everyone know that he’s sorry, that he feels badly, that he recognizes the problem and that he wants you to feel better. Flowers ordered and sent to the office indicate he put at least a modicum of effort into it, he had to remember it long enough to get online and order them, he had to mean it enough to pull out the plastic and pony up the exorbitant fee, basically it required something out of him.

Flowers from the grocery store say “I know you’re kinda pissed, I don’t really know or care why, but I passed these on my way through the store and thought they might make you forget you’re mad at me”.

Flowers from the grocery store for absolutely no reason are cute and adorable, a nice gesture. Flowers from the grocery store as an apology or admission of problems are insincere and will probably get you in more trouble than before.

Not that that happened at the Junebug household last night. Just saying is all…

posted by The Call Me Junebug @ 1:16 PM